Why Is It So Hard to Find The Right Person?

You’re looking for love but can’t find someone you want to settle down with. Maybe you’ve met some okay matches, or potential love interests no one who really makes you want to commit. This is common for most single adults today.

According to a survey conducted by the Pew Research Center singles today find dating harder than it’s ever been. If you are desperately trying to find a loving partner (and I use the word desperate in the most respectful of terms) this statistic should come as no surprise. There are various reasons why finding a partner is incredibly difficult for the modern single but in this article we’ll cover one particular reason that seems to plague almost every person that is single.

Standards.

How many times as a single person have you heard — maybe your standards are too high. Or have you heard someone say, “I have really high standards.” It’s a concept that is often equated with singleness but one that is commonly misunderstood.

What Does It Mean to Have High Standards

First, let’s investigate what it means to have high standards.

Every person alive has both standards and values. Often values are non-negotiable beliefs that govern your everyday habits. Your values are the actions you engage in to get specific outcomes. You might go to bed early because you value being rested and you value sleep. You might stay in because you value your alone time.

You might believe saying ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’ are the best ways to show respect so you always use them in your speech. Values often govern our behavior, while standards tend to govern our choices.

Standards are the level of quality (like an internal quality control) required for us to feel satisfied. Enjoying a good meal, having a clean home, buying items that cost more instead of store offered brands are examples of standards. The way you feel as a result something, your level of satisfaction, is often due to your standards.

Relationships are developed at the cornerstone of matched standards and values. In dating, if someone doesn’t share your values it’s difficult for you to connect with them. If someone doesn’t share your standards it’s difficult for…